Who said that a gluten-free lifestyle had to be tasteless?  This is a recipe I tried from The Cooking Light Gluten-Free Cookbook.  It tasted great and was easy to make (less than 1 hour from set up to soup in the bowl when you have no pre-chopping/cooking done). Give it a try!

Serving Size: 7 – 2 cup soup servings, each with a lime wedge
Nutritional Info:
Calories: 315
Fat: 7.8g (2.7 sat; 2.2g mono, 1.3g poly)
Protein: 29.3g
Carbs: 30.9g
Fiber: 2.4g
Chol: 62 mg
Iron: 3.2mg
Sodium: 842 mg
Calc: 78 mg 

Time: It took me about 45 minutes to have soup in bowls, with none of the items pre-made or chopped.

Ingredients:

4 cups of water
3 cups of fresh spinach leaves
1/2 pound snow peas, trimmed and cut in half crosswise
1 (5-3/4 oz) package of pad Thai noodles (rice stick noodles)
1 tbsp canola oil
1/4 cup thinly sliced shallots
2 tsp red curry paste
1-1/2 tsp curry powder
1/2 tsp ground turmeric
1/2 tsp ground coriander
2 garlic cloves, minced
6 cups fat-free, lower sodium chicken broth (*check for gluten when you purchase this item, make sure to get gluten-free*)
1 (13.5 oz) can light coconut milk
2-1/2 cups shredded cooked chicken breast (about 1 lb) (I boil the chicken then “pull” it into pieces)
1/2 cup chopped green onions
2 tbsp sugar
2 tbsp fish sauce (such as Thai Kitchen)
1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro
4 small hot red chiles, seeded and chopped (or you can use 1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper instead)
7 lime wedges

I LOVED this soup.  The only thing is that because I didn’t do any prep or pre cooking my noodle mix sat for a while.  Not sure if this is normal or not.  Anticipating that I will probably not pre-cook my chicken next time, I think that the next time I make this I will start cooking my chicken and start step 2 first.  While I’m waiting for my broth mix to boil, I will start boiling water for my noodles.  If timing goes well, I should be ready to cook the spinach, beans and noodles once I’m simmering my coconut milk for 5 minutes.  Maybe this will help keep my noodles from sticking so much. 

Over the past few months, two people I know were recruited and offered job promotions through LinkedIn.  The first story I thought was a rare occurance, but after hearing the second story I thought there might be something to this professional social media/networking thing and decided it was time to “complete” my profile.

Up until the last few weeks, my profile had no picture, no great details about me or my professional experience.  I may have had my undergraduate and graduate programs and my current employer listed so that I could connect with classmates and current colleagues, of course.  That’s about it.

I’m not actively looking for a new job right now, but considering the changes that are coming forward in my company and specifically at my specific location, I figured it would be prudent to start preparing for changes should they become necessary in the future.

So I signed into my linked in account.  Added a picture, updated my resume, and accepted a few friends.  I clicked a few companies and groups I’d like to follow and the rest has been history.

Then last night happened…

(disclaimer – To date I have been a long-time blogger (not consistent as of late), active on Facebook, and participate in a few other online discussions where my identity remains relatively disconnected from my career and livelihood).

I found this one particular LinkedIn group that seemed to have interesting conversations pertinent to my industry and interests.  I loved the content so I jumped in on the discussions.

One technical question that was posed had some good responses, and one response that summed the issue up really well.

I did what any millennial Facebooker would do and I “LIKED” this comment posted the LinkedIn Group Page.

Then I came across another conversation where someone posted an article.  There were a few responses to the article, one of which I disagreed with.  Well, most of it was okay, but there was one rather grandiose assumption of the secondary effects of this major change highlighted in the article.

I did what any net-active blogger/commenter/social media-ite would do and I challenged it by posting my own comment to the article/the comment I disagreed with.  I emphasized other market forces at work outside the US… blah, blah, blah.  Really, I had researched this very thing earlier in the fall and was excited to be able to apply what I learned from my research to a real conversation.  Or to even have that kind of conversation with others in like-industries was exciting for me.  (Silly?  Possibly.  Nerd?  Definitely.)

My concern after the fact became this…

Over the past 24 hours, people I don’t know, who saw this “challenge comment”, have looked at my profile.  I know because LinkedIn tells me this.  Then when I look at their profiles, I can see that they know some of the same people I know.  Suddenly my comments and activity on this new LinkedIn group thing take on a whole new dynamic that I’ve never before experienced through blogging, facebook and other social media channels.

Usually, I either don’t know who’s “looking” at me, or they can’t look at me because of security settings.  BUT the whole idea of LinkedIn is networking…i.e. finding connections through other connections, connecting through interests, industries, etc.  Here, people can check my profile without “friend requesting” me (what does LinkedIn call it?), and that’s perfectly okay.  But I’m seeing some traffic to my profile as a result of my comment with no responses/feedback to said comment and I’m getting all paranoid inside.

Was I spot on?  Was I  wrong?  Was I awesome?  Was I a jerk?  I don’t know, I don’t know!?!?!

I mean, if I totally botched my comment, are these people going to contact their people who are also my people and tell them to check their employee who’s spouting off all kinds of stuff on some social media site?  I wasn’t rude to the guy (I don’t think) and (obviously) I think the point made was relevant…

Moral of the story is that I need help.  I want to continue collaborating and conversing in this place, but I don’t know the ins and outs of this professional social networking business.  Do I just need to get used to people looking at my profile and not make a big deal out of it like I am right now?  Are there rules that I need to abide by?  Is there a different etiquette that I must learn for LinkedIn that is different from Twitter, or Facebook or YouTube or other social media channels?  Is it okay to disagree with someone on a linked in group thread, if you’re tactful about it?  And what exactly does “tactful” look like in this instance?  Or are we supposed to not say anything if what we have to say disagrees with what everyone (or just someone) has already said?

I need a crash course in professional social media for dummies…can anyone help me out?

I was there at the launch service – my first time at this new church.  I had been praying for changes in my life and, more specifically, a new church when a flyer showed up at my door.  I went that first week and have been going ever since.

This past weekend we had our church’s first Woman’s Retreat.  We had space for 30 women to go, and after some last minute cancellations and fill-ins we arrived at the site with 29 women + 1 speaker.

Even though this was my first ever retreat for women, I ended up being part of the planning team.  My responsibility was to prepare a prayer room (which also meant encouraging the prayer team ladies to sign up and help pull something together) and then at the last minute was asked to be a discussion group leader  when another was unable to fill the slot.  Immediately after the first planning meeting, the prayer team started praying for the event and for the ladies that God would be bringing this weekend.

Leading up to the retreat, our prayer team came up with some ideas for the prayer room and we scrambled together supplies.  By 3 PM Friday, we were at the house.  We walk in the door only to realize that the prayer room is an open space just off the main entrance filled with a hot tub and exercise equipment.

As we started processing the difficult situation before us, I thought of a dear friend who loved the quote, “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade” and encouraged the team that we can still make this space work if we get a little creative.  We moved some of the exercise equipment out of the room, we rearranged the remaining pieces, plugged in a few night lights, and found 2 dividers to create “walls” where none existed.  When the prayer room opened that night, it actually turned out to be a pretty decent space.  Once we were done setting up, the prayer team walked the entire house praying over spaces, rooms, and each attendee by name.

Later that night the guests arrive…and God starts to work.

Over the course of the weekend I saw girls engaged in conversations, connecting, laughing, and relaxing.  We were encouraged and challenged by our wonderful speaker.  In discussion groups, the women opened up and “got real” about what was going on in their life and what God was (or wasn’t) doing.  Tissues went flying, we cooked too much food, and I think we even got a complaint called in to the local authorities because we were being “way too loud” during worship.

Sunday afternoon, I was the last person to use the prayer room.  I sat there praying and praising, feeling completely overwhelmed by what God had done:

• Women who I know have been seeking community and feeling like they “don’t fit in” sincerely connected with at least 1 new person, if not more on this trip.

• Several women had very deep and personal encounters with God…the Holy Spirit was so evident by Sunday morning’s worship session that you could taste it.

• I “peeked in” on the prayer room several times over the weekend to see women praying, having their devotional, and partaking in the prayer room activity.

• We didn’t have Sunday morning discussion groups, because by the end of the talk and worship time, 2 women had decided that they wanted to get baptized.  Everyone ran out to watch and celebrate on the beach together.  One of these women gave me the honor to be one of the two to go in the water to baptize her.

By Sunday night I found myself overwhelmed again as I saw the connections and comments flying across the walls of the ladies’ Facebook pages.  (oh the movements of His hand may I never miss…)

I think it’s funny to know God and have faith in God, but then find ourselves surprised by what He actually does in different situations.  Months ago I confessed how scared I was that I might not be able to do what He had called me to do.  I am continually brought back to God’s exhortation to Moses that the fruit of his obedience would be a sign to him that God has sent him.  This weekend I felt like I saw and was affirmed that God has not only brought me and others to this place for this time, but gave me a personal reminder of HOW BIG HE IS.  Sometimes God moves to show the unbelieving generations who he is…and at other times He moves to remind his children that he alone is God.

I left Sunday afternoon feeling a strong conviction that I need to obey him and be present in the service and ministry opportunities He has put before me, today.  Being obedient here and now will move me into whatever plans he has for me in 1 months, or 6 months or years into the future.  They may be different, or more of the same.  Regardless, if I focus too much on what may or may not lie ahead, I might miss the beautiful movement of his Hand today.   This weekend I saw His hand…and I am in awe at how good, tender, and completely faithful He is to His daughters.

As I reflect on all that happened, I find myself especially surprised by grace. You see, it is the grace that comes from Christ that enables us to stand as a co-laborer with Him, appointed to bear fruit for His Glory (2 Cor 6:1, John 15:16).  We are able to serve out a calling  (no matter how big or small it may seem) because of His Grace.  We do not deserve it, nor are we entitled to it…yet, we are allowed to experience it.

I am not in any way responsible for what happened this weekend, but I am tasting the sweet blessing that comes from the steps of obedience that have been placed before me and the team of people I serve with.  I don’t know if it is the culmination of months of praying and planning, or if it the simple realization that God is living and active today, either way this feeling…this “surprised by grace” place is one I hope to sit in for as long as He’ll let me.

The article got me thinking, not so much of submission, but more of what I would call chivalry and the roles or actions that guys have historically taken toward women.  I even polled friends via. a Facebook status to see if other women were often offended when guys would do these nice things for them.  The majority of responses, from both Christians and non-Christians fell into agreement.

It seems that in this guy’s class there may have been some “feminists” in the room, many women like it when guys hold doors for them or pay for their meals.  One woman stated that there was a time in her younger years, she felt that double standards ran rampant and she wanted to feel independent.  Sure she was a woman and she too could open doors and pay for things for herself.  She concluded her remark by stating that over the last 20 years, however, she began to realize that there was more to those actions than whether or not she was capable of opening doors, there was a love and attention factor that she actually appreciated when a guy would do those things.

I have to fall into agreement with her.  I am a fairly independent woman.  I never want to hear someone tell me I can’t do it.  For a long time I would make sure I had my hand on the door handle before a guy was ever given a chance to open it for me.  Over time, and through the feedback of boyfriends and guy friends, I began to notice that these actions also never allowed them to do nice things for me.  Some guy friends and co-workers eventually influenced me to slow down as I approached a door and wait for it to be opened.  They spoke of it as a woman’s “right” to have the doors opened for her (sure, that sounds kinda weird, but I can’t think of a better way to describe it).  My ex boyfriend always opened the car door for me.  It got to the point that I would stand at the door and wait for him to open it.  He told me stories of how His dad had taught him that by watching the interactions between his dad and mom.  I watched and sure enough I began to realize that she never touched a door.  I never saw it as subtracting from her identity as a capable woman, but rather found a deep love and care come through those simple actions.

I think that somewhere along the way, we have put the idea of “independent woman” and “feminist” on a pedestal that’s so high that eventually we began to lose some of the beauty that these simple actions actually carry.

Whether or not one is a feminist in the most current of definitions does not take away from the reality that deep down she too has a desire to be loved, to feel special, and to be cared for.  I believe there is something in how God created us that drives those desires and needs.  While opening the door for a lady hardly scratches the surface of man’s ability to meet those needs, it does affect them in the most positive of ways.

I wonder if women sometimes use their feminist attitudes and independence as a means of protection.  If we are not dependent on a man, regardless of how simple that dependence may be in any given moment (such as opening a door), we are, or think we are, protecting ourselves from getting hurt.  If we don’t need anyone to do little things…we won’t get disappointed when they don’t…or when they won’t.  But if we, men and women, were in fact created with different needs and “roles” (in a deep inward sense), I am starting to think that perhaps those very attitudes and actions that we hold to protect ourselves actually lead us to missing out on very sweet gestures that can help us to feel special in ways that only men can influence.

Let me explain.  I never knew the momentary blessing and special feeling that I would experience by something as simple as opening a door until I finally let a guy do it for me.  Now, I love it.  I want it.  I always felt special when my ex would open the car door for me.  When a class mate stopped me to carry my heavy book bag down the stairs…I didn’t feel inferior, actually it felt really great!  AND it boosted my confidence in men in general, knowing that there were still some that wanted to care for and serve the women around them in very small ways like this.

I guess I am a feminist of sorts, but not the kind you might be thinking.  I am a feminist in that I recognize that there are unique roles given to me as a woman for how I approach, interact with and encourage the men around me.  In the book Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, John Piper defines biblical masculinity in this way:

“at the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead, provide for, and protect women in ways appropriate to a man’s differing relationships.”

He defines biblical femininity this way:

“at the heart of mature femininity is a freeing disposition to affirm, receive, and nurture strength and leadership from worthy men in ways appropriate to a woman’s differing relationships.”

This freedom for a woman isn’t in being squelched or cramped or suppressed, but rather is experienced as she practices these little moments of encouraging the men around her (among other things).  When a guy holds a door for you, LET HIM.  And then thank him…He is practicing in one way or another the attributes of how he was created.  He’s not saying that your arms are broken…He’s probably acting in a way that seems most natural for him, even if he’s not fully cognizant of it in that very moment.  Ladies, even if it seems unnatural at first, practice, make the effort and give him the chance…you might even learn that these little gestures encourage your own sense of value, worth, and “feeling special” in those little moments.  Heck, you just might like it!

Turning 30 this year has been interesting (and I’m not even a month into my 30′s!).  I’m in a church where most of the women my age are married or very close to it, and many have kids.  Actually, I’m not sure that I know any other women who are also single and my age that go there.  Not always, but sometimes it can be hard (especially in the middle of wedding season).  Most of my single friends are younger than me…and the single guys I know are also younger than me.  I’m okay with that.  Age for me hasn’t been much of an issue…and when dating, age was never been on my mind, regardless of who was older.  This year, and perhaps somewhat because of the people I find myself surrounded by coupled with my history of dating as a christian (which is hardly anything to brag about) I’ve found myself fighting the insecurity that now that I’m 30, no one will want to date me.

This insecurity was completely unfounded and silly…I know this.  (but I’m a girl…and as men can attest to…we often have silly and unfounded insecurities that we have to battle…on an almost daily basis)

So yes, unfounded

…until recently.

I have a sweet friend who decided that she wanted to set me up on a blind date.  I’ve never done anything like that before, and after her description of the guy she had in mind, I thought why not?

Single?  Check

Loves the Lord?  Check

Missions/Ministry Minded?  Check

Height?  eh…not really what I find myself *most* attracted to, but I can “check” the more superficial physical attributes to give the fella a chance

My friend starts talking to him. And they’re texting.  His quick responses made both of us think he was open to the idea.  So they’re texting back and forth.  Then he asks, “how old is she?”  Without thinking my friend responds, “she’s 30″.  His response?

:-/

The emoticon that means, not great, undecided, iffy, ehhh, hmmm, etc

Now, I can understand this if he was in his early 20′s.  The younger you are the tighter the band typically is around the age of the people you will consider dating.

Naturally, I did what any young millennial would do and I Facebook stalked him to see how old he actually was.  How old is he?  he’ll be 28 this year.  2 years!!  2 years and he thinks  :-/  about a 30 year old woman who he has yet to meet and only knows that she “loves the Lord”.  COME ON!!!  I know can’t hate on him too badly and I don’t know him AT ALL so there is minimal emotional disappointment tied to this experience.  but still…I’m a little taken back.

Looks like I’m still dateless, which is okay…I guess.   In less than a month of my birthday I now have my first official rejection “because I’m 30″.  Now I’m just sitting here trying to laugh at my visualization of the emoticon expression that he sent in response to my age…and trying not to let this experience grow that silly little insecurity that Christian men who “love the Lord” will never be interested because…”now I’m 30″.

*Sigh*

In the end, I told my friend that I wasn’t interested anymore.  If we met for coffee or whatever it is that people do on blind dates, I would sit there the whole time looking at him with that silly little emoticon hovering over his head mocking me.  The right guy is out there…and to him…age, my education, my quirks, and my 6 gray hairs…none of that will matter.  He will see the woman God has created me to be and the Love I have for the Lord…and that will be more than enough

Short term missions have a lot of value – not only for the staff and organizations that are served, but also for the individuals who are going.  Sure, that seems selfish, but it’s a reality that can not be ignored…after all, if you are truly going with a “learner’s heart”, how can you expect to not receive something about God and His Global Kingdom when you go?

I hope and sense that our efforts to serve Child Hope were valuable.  The house we provided, the things we built and organized, the care we provided with the kids – all of those efforts were to serve the staff working there for long-term and the community and kids they are caring for.

On a personal level, I came back from Haiti with some conviction that I had to take to the Lord.  I’m used to being the odd person out.  I usually know how people are going to respond when they start asking questions about my parents or life growing up.  I know my story is a little awkward or sad for people to hear, but I’m okay with that.  For the first time in my life, and by going to an orphanage, I found myself surrounded by kids who have stories that carry more similarities than I’m used to finding in the people I typically encounter.  I didn’t really feel like the odd person out because I knew they too experienced loss and had to grow up far too early.  In some cases I felt like I was staring into a mirror – seeing in others tendencies others have brought to my attention (that I couldn’t really see in myself).  In other cases, I felt like being there with those kids was God’s way of showing me there was something beyond the mirror into which I was staring.

let me explain…

I don’t for one instance claim to know or understand the full experience of life that these kids have, but in some ways I relate. I know what its like to be abandoned and unwanted by one parent, only to watch the other die at a young age.  I struggled to make sense of justice and love in the midst of some really bad experiences.  This is the mirror that I’m speaking of.  It is different from the lives of these kids, but perhaps more relatable and similar than any other community of people that I’ve ever met.

What I noticed and rejoiced with the Child Hope kids is that regardless of their circumstances, they loved to praise and worship God.  I saw pure joy exuding from them at times…simple excitement, thanksgiving, and praise to the Lord.  And this is where God started showing me what was beyond that mirror.  I think it is best described as “joy”.

Coming home, I was very convicted at my own lack of thankfulness toward God and was led to repentance. Beyond the circumstances that have defined our past or are shaping our current reality, there is God and through His Holy Spirit, joy is possible.  There are opportunities to be thankful and to worship God that are not circumstantial.  In Philippians 4:8 Paul exhorts us to focus on what is good and worthy of praise.  I speculate that we are more prone to look at the trials and difficulties we face than we are to the good things, especially when things aren’t necessarily “good”.  It takes effort to look beyond those harder realities into the character of God and worship Him.  God challenged me to do that during our week in Haiti using kids who exuded joy.  He left no room for the exemptions that I usually conjure up when I see joy alive in the lives of others.  I couldn’t find a single “yeah, but…” as I tried to understand what was before my eyes.  They have experienced the harder realities of life, but they had something different…something I wanted.

In a place where I expected to see pain and sorrow much more manifest I found Joy…and through that experience God is challenging me to be more thankful toward Him and through Grace, He is ultimately leading me to experience more joy.

I will never forget this opportunity, and I am so thankful to those who helped to make it possible.  Every time I share, I tell a different story and realize a different way that I saw God move.  The staff of Child Hope do a wonderful job at loving these kids and pointing them to Christ…Maison de lumiere is truly a house of light in this nation.

now stop reading and go PRAISE God for them and PRAY for the work they continue to do there

As my supporters know, my heart and prayers leading up to the trip were for the girls in the orphanage.  I was hoping and praying that God would show up, someway, somehow with the older girls that I would meet.

So I get there and the first day, we go to a park where all the kids are playing.  I see a group of girls gathered together.  Having prayed for them for weeks prior, I thought it was a perfect opportunity to break the ice.  I walked up and tried to have a conversation with them.   Let me tell you, these girls were tough.  They didn’t really seem like they wanted to talk to me, or the other women from my team who followed me over a few minutes later.  I’m not gonna lie…it was a little awkward.

Eventually, games started up and we all went on our merry little way…

That night as I journaled and prayed, I asked God, “what happened?”  I mean, I had been praying for these girls…and I got walls and distance from them.  Perhaps in their minds, we were just like most other people who would come in for a short time and leave.  Their apparent distance made sense, but it didn’t help my feelings of “defeat”, so to speak.

Over the next several days there was one girl, Oline, who continued to come across my path.  She was younger, and so would have been off my radar (according to “my plans)  if it hadn’t been for the fact that she approached me to say hello and she spoke English fairly well.  Also, she had distinctive barrettes in her hair, so every time after that first encounter I would not only remember her name, but also her face.  Whenever I saw her I made a point to talk to her…often teasing and joking with her about climbing trees and eating the fruits from the trees.

Thursday was a holiday so we hung out with the girls at the girls’ home.  Oline, came over and sat with me holding a picture book that some other team had made for the kids.  She showed me the pictures and told me about the kids and people in the book.  When she closed the book, she saw something written and began to read it to me.

The passage was Isaiah 61.  She stumbled on a few words and asked me how to pronounce them.  After a line or two…and at each line or two she would stop and ask me what it meant.  Isaiah 61 is about Jesus, so I was able to talk to her a little about that and tell her about Jesus and what he wanted to do with the people who believed in Him.  Later that afternoon we took the kids to a nearby park.  Wearing the proper shoes, I decided that I would climb the trees with her.  While climbing our 2nd tree she started to ask me about my family back home.  I shared with her that my dad left my mom before I was born and that my mom had gotten really sick and died when I was 14.  She also asked about my brothers and sisters…I told her I had none.  Since she asked me the question, I thought it was okay at that time to ask her the same questions.  She told me that her mom had gotten sick and died also…I’m guessing that’s part of the story behind her being at the orphanage.  By this point other kids were climbing up the tree and wanting to talk to us so I let that conversation come to a close, without going any further.

Later that afternoon, we had all gone over to the swings and were swinging and talking.  At one point she asked if I would be at summer camp that summer.  I told her no and that I had to go home  in a few days.  She looked down at the ground and ran off.

I had other encounters with her and she hung out with me listening to music for a while the next day…our last full day there, but I’ll never forget her response to that last question.  And this is what has me perplexed now.

I think about the responses of many of the older girls and Oline’s seeming disappointment when I told her I had to go home in a few days.  I can’t help but wonder where the value lies in short-term mission teams working with Orphans.  Granted, our team did much to help the ministry in very tangible ways, but with the kids themselves, do short-term teams just perpetuate the reality that many of them have learned throughout their lives – that people will come and go?  Will short-term teams just encourage their self-preservation and defense mechanisms, making it more difficult for them to trust and learn about authentic community?  I see the relationships that the long-term workers have with the kids and it’s really good…and I think the Lord uses that greatly in the lives of these kids and I know the Lord is sovereign and wanted us there (without a doubt), but I still struggle with the impacts of these short-term mission teams working at orphanages.

I have a good friend who works with World Orphans.  Him and his wife are preparing to go to Thailand in 2012 to do similar work, only for long-term.  I can’t wait to work through these thoughts and ideas with them.  Maybe it’s just my own inner turmoil because of how God has wired me to serve His People and how I typically approach lay ministry and missions in general…or perhaps there is something to this that is valid.  Right now I’m not sure.  I am so thankful for those conversations I had with Oline.  And I’m thankful for the encounters I had with all the girls – The LORD opened my eyes to things that I’m not going to share in this post.  All of it was good, even though I had to take myself and my hopes/plans/expectations/agenda out of the picture in order to see it.

This is the part (or story) of my trip that kills me in a ministry sense, knowing and having a passion for growth and Godly transformation that must occur over a longer time, but only being present for a week in the lives of these kids.  This is a take-away and “struggle” that I wasn’t expecting, but continue to process through now that I’ve had this experience.

While in Haiti, and on reflecting after the trip, I have been challenged to bring more thanksgiving into my life.  I have a tendency to be a bit of a Negative Nancy, focusing of the bad…or expecting the bad, because sometimes I guess I think that’s all I’ll get…bad things.  As I enter into a new decade of my life (the 30′s), I feel that its only right for me to reflect on my 20′s praising God for the work he’s done in the past 10 years.  I was originally going to post this as a “high-low” of each year, but in light of the verse above, I’m going to focus on the “highs” – and for all of these items, the Glory goes to God.

20 years old (2001) – On September 2, 2001 God revealed to me the Truth of what His Son Jesus did for me, I came to Him and He gave me a new life (2 Cor 5:17) – and started this journey with Him, which has been absolutely amazing.  Hard at times, but always beautiful and for His Glory.

21 years old (2002) – 1st Missions Trip to Japan.  God opened my eyes and heart for His people…all His people, to the ends of the earth.  During this time he specifically broke my heart for the unreached in Japan. 

22 years old (2003) – Graduated College – By the grace of God I not only was able to go to college, but also graduated…and I had 2 job offers!!   I attended my 1st Urbana Conference.

23 years old (2004) – God opened my eyes to the idolatry that had consumed my life and connected me with a solid, missions minded church that would become a major influence on my development as a woman of God. 

24 years old (2005 ) – Mission Trips to Poland and Japan – It was during this time that God solidified my missionary heart and confirmed it through several people, without me even asking. 

25 years old (2006) – Accepted by an organization to do Church Planting in Japan.  Started a Missionary in training program with an awesome pastor at my church.  God “forced” me to go into counseling to deal with stuff that I had been avoiding my entire life – the result completely changed my understanding of who I was and the value I have as a Child of God.  I attended my 2nd Urbana Conference. 

26 years old (2007) – Went to Ghana in 2007.  Gave my first full message on the freedom we can find in Christ and prayed with many girls who wanted to know the freedom that God’s truth brings.  Became a Youth Leader and finished out the senior year of several amazing students that had been on the Ghana trip.  Finally believed that God’s love for me was unconditional.

27 years old (2008) – Spoke on the value of mentoring (Titus 2) at a woman’s seminar and helped to plan a women’s training event under the leadership of some awesome women at my church.  Applied to and was accepted to be part of a core team for a church plant that my church was sending out.  

28 years old (2009) – Started a church plant with a group of 28 others from my church.  Started my MBA program. Shared the gospel with a random man in my town with two of my friends.  Went to El Salvador to celebrate a friend’s wedding (she’s a missionary there). 

29 years old (2010) – Met regularly with a few girls to read God on Mute.  Started a prayer gathering with some awesome friends.  The group has changed from its beginnings, but we continue to meet to pray for friends, the world, and the churches working in our area.  God brought me to a new church and started to bring about some unexpected changes in my life. 

29 years old (2011) –  Went to Haiti on a Missions Trip and was reminded that my heart for the nations is still very much alive, even though He uses it in ways I didn’t expect when I planned my life several years ago (ha!).  God called me to start a prayer ministry at my church and He has brought together a group that I absolutely LOVE to pray with on a weekly basis.  Had several girls talk to me about doing a girls study or group for several of the women at my church.  We’re now going through Believing God this summer and I’m very excited for how we’ll all grow in our Faith. 

If someone told me this would be the life I would live in my 20′s, I would have laughed in their face.  Actually, someone did.  I was still an atheist at the time and I literally laughed in their face.  Praise God for lives that are radically changed through His Son’s sacrifice!!!  Walking with Him hasn’t always been easy, but looking back I can see clearly that God has been at work and I am so blessed to take a small part in what he’s been doing over the past 10 years.

I have no idea what my 30′s will bring.  He’s done crazy things with the last 10 years…I’m sure the next 10 will be just as Glorifying to His name.  I know many constants in my life are changing over the next year.  I will go to China in a little over a month.  When I return, I have 6 months left of my MBA.  Lord willing I will graduate in Feb 2012.  My company will complete its merger and the plant I work at will be sold.  This is where the unknown kicks in…there is so much that is not seen, but the possibilities of what God can do are endless…I just hope that He continues to allow me to be part of what He’s doing here on earth.  For now, He reveals just enough for me to take that next step.

“By faith, Abraham obeyed when he was called out to a place…he went out not knowing where he was going.” (Heb. 11:8)

Earlier this year I was taking an International Business Class.  Our big project for this class was to study and present on a hot topic in the realm of international business.  One of my teammates suggested that we use “human trafficking” as our topic of study.  As a christian I know such injustices exist and immediately jumped on the idea.  I only really thought of sex trafficking, as that seems to be the most widely thought of when it comes to modern-day slavery.  To research the project I dug through the CNN Freedom Project website and read Disposable People – New Slavery in the Global Economy by Kevin Bales, and referenced Sex Trafficking – Inside the business of Modern Slavery by Siddharth Kara.  I also read Good News About Injustice by Gary Haugen.  It was also during this time that I had been praying about and finally decided to go on the mission trip to Haiti.

It is estimated that about  27 Million slaves exist today, most of which are women and children.  I was surprised to find out that Haiti had its own form of slavery; they are called restavecs.

Fast forward to June 23.  I was climbing trees with one of the girls in the orphanage (I’ll share about her in another post).  We started in one tree…got yelled at because we seemed to attract older kids to a park that was meant for younger kids.  We relocated to a second tree, just as climbable, but closer to the “big kid” playground.  After 5 minutes or so in this tree…several other kids followed up after us.  Seriously, these kids are like monkeys!  They definitely put my tree climbing abilities to shame.  I’ll blame it on my age

Most of the other kids climbed up, but quickly jumped back down.  One kid, however, lingered in the trees with us.  He didn’t speak English, and the only word I could understand from him was belle, which means pretty.  Ti-Junior, was everywhere all week.  If we were with the orphanage kids (as was the case that day) he was there.  If we were at the feeding program (meant for the neighborhood kids) he was there.  If we were traveling through the neighborhood…he was there.  All week this kid (along with a few others) would show up.  I never knew who he was…local, orphanage kid, or what.

In the tree that day, however, I started to see a different side of him.  He braided my hair, and pretty much kept his hand on my arm.  It wasn’t weird or creepy at all…just childlike affection.  When I got out of the tree to sit on the swings, he followed…holding my hand and wanting to push me or be pushed on the swings.

After a few minutes, the “house mom” for the boys home came over.  She’s american, so I was able to ask her what Ti-Junior’s story was.  The other kids that were in the trees came over and were able to translate so that we could understand more of his story.

Basically this kid was a restavec who was able to run away and become free again.  His parents died, we think, in the earthquake that hit Haiti in 2010.  Apparently, he was found by a man who lets him sleep in a school each night, having to leave in the mornings before students arrive.  He’s 11 years old and has no one, and the fact that the man allows him to not sleep on the streets is a blessing.  Right now Child Hope doesn’t have room to bring him in, but according to the house mom, they have their eyes on him for when space opens up for more kids.

As the house mom shared with me his story, everything started to make sense.  I have no idea when the last time was that this little boy felt the hug of a mother or was ever told that he was loved…or even felt love.   I couldn’t help but wonder what goes on in his mind over the hand he’s been dealt in this life.  My heart broke.  It still breaks.  I can only hope that he felt the love of Christ as we played in the trees and on the swings…That he feels loved by the staff that remains in Haiti and by the other blancs (white people/americans) that come on short-term trips.

When I got back to the guest house that night it was time for dinner, but immediately afterward I ran up and sat on the roof.  I needed to be away from others so that I could just breathe and process the hurt I felt for this kid.  I must have cried for a total of 3 hours that night…praying, talking to God and sharing his story with my teammates.

I had studied the crazy reality of modern slavery, I presented on it…wrote about it.  I knew going there, that the issue was real.  I knew some of the kids in the orphanage were ex-restavecs.  But none of that fully prepared me for the moment that one of those kids went from being a statistic to being a real kid…a kid with a name, holding my arm, smiling back as I smiled at him.  In that moment I realized that each person that makes up that statistic has a name.  They are real.  They are like all other kids, wanting/needing affection and attention.  They want to know that they are loved and special.  Even as I type this, I’m not sure that I can do justice to the emotion welling up inside…nor to the gravity that this one experience…this one kid…has produced in my life.

One of the scariest, but often most rewarding things we can pray is to ask God to give us the eyes to see what he sees and the heart to feel what he feels toward the people we encounter.  I pray that often…and prayed it every day leading up to and during my time in Haiti.  Ti-Junior was just one example of how that prayer was answered during this trip.  My heart breaks for that little kid, but I would have it no other way.  I feel helpless in looking at his situation, but I know it has/will change me forever…even if I’m just barely scratching the surface at what that change is today.  God used him in an incredible way, I can only pray that one day he will know and believe the Love that our Heavenly Father has for him…that he would realize he IS special, regardless of what lies the enemy may feed him as he processes the circumstances that have come to define his life thus far.

At work today I had two different conversations that led to people asking about my life, my family…where I’ve come from.  I also had someone ask specifically how I went from being an atheist to a Christian.  These types of things don’t often come up, at least not at work.  As an educated and articulate woman, the outward appearance of my life doesn’t often reflect what I’ve come from.  Most would never know until they ask these deeper, more personal questions.  Sure, people know that I’m a Christian, but usually that’s because they know I do crazy things like spend my vacations serving in places like Haiti.  Or they know because of our debates on whether or not my conviction to only date Christian men is a “right” conviction or “too high of a standard”.  It’s rare in that environment that I’m able to provide context around why I feel so strongly that the life I live today is purely by the Grace of God.  The fact that I’m alive today and have the opportunities that I have is a direct reflection of God’s sovereignty, power and ability to change lives.  Today was a little different.  It was hard, because I never know what they’re thinking when I share my reality with them, but it was also pretty cool to live through the opportunity of sharing more with them.

Then, this evening I walked down to the docks to sit and chat with a friend.  While I was there another guy that I know just because he’s a local came over and sat with us.  This is a guy that I prayed for feverently for the first year or two that I lived in this neighborhood.  He’s a nice guy that I’d had random conversations with…about life and God and beliefs and what not.  The last time I saw him was about 2 months ago.  He walked by, and coldly ignored me when I said hi to him.  He had lost over 50 lbs.  From the looks of him, I knew he was shooting heroine.  I was sad that he ignored me, but sadder still at the realization of how much trouble he was in…drowning in his addiction.  Today he looked better.  He shared with us the fact that he’d been clean for 2 weeks.  My suspicions were correct from the last time I saw him, but he’s now going to meetings a few times a day, every day.  He’s still unsure of what higher being is over this world, but He is earnestly trying to get clean and stay that way.  Eventually,  our conversation led to how faithful God is and how much of a blessing life is…especially when we’re giving second chances…the second chance that he’s now starting to live in.  He recognizes the gift of life that he’s been given, and though he remains unsure of Jesus and the Lord,  I was so glad to talk to him and to celebrate his two weeks of sobriety.

Tonight as I was reading the Word and meditating on the day’s events, I was brought back to the idea of God’s faithfulness.  God is able to do so much in our lives…and with our lives…no matter the pit that we start from or find ourselves in.  God has literally built my life from ashes…despair, anger and regret.  I can see the power he has exhibited in my life and so many lives of the brothers and sisters I meet.  Conviction sneaks in as I realize the steadfastness of his love and my lingering doubt of what God can and will do in this life.  Sometimes it’s difficult to believe God for what he is currently doing, when we can’t see the finished product before our eyes.  yet we must!  Hebrews 11 states it this way:

“Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen” 

After reading this tonight my ADHD eyes shot up a few lines prior to Hebrews 10 where I read this:

“Therefore brothers, since we have confidence to enter the holy places by the blood of Jesus…and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water.  Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering for he who is promised is faithful.  And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works not neglecting to meet together as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” (vs. 19-25)

We have a God who is so faithful, loving, and forgiving.  He has been at work in our lives and continues to move in accordance with his pleasure and will.  He desires to bless those who continually seek him earnestly (Heb. 11:6).  It may be difficult to believe him when the resolve seems no where in sight, but as the one who stands unchanged…His past faithfulness in our lives serves as an indicator that He who began a good work in us will continue it to its full completion (Phil 1:6).  When unbelief sets in, how rewarding it is to remember and praise him for the Work we have already seen him complete…may that stir us on to believe for those things not yet seen in their completed form…as Hebrews 11:1 states…THIS is faith.

“for the mountains may depart and the hills be removed, but my steadfast love shall not depart from you and my covenant of peace shall not be removed says the Lord, who has compassion on you.” (Isaiah 54:10).